I'm watching part 2 of Oprah's show that has an audience of 200 men who are victims of sexual abuse, and I've been going through what I will call an emotional boat ride (just a little bit of up and down on the waves) because I have been trying to find the words to explain how I feel about where I am at this point in my life. I too am a victim of sexual abuse, and had the misfortune of finding out that something similar has happened to my own child, so it could have been easier all of these years to continue coping with what has happened, as opposed to healing and hopefully growing and learning. But, to get back on topic, I recently found myself trying to offer a good explanation whenever I've been asked "how are you?", and it finally hit me as I was watching part 2 of these special Oprah episodes...
I am past the point of trying to prove to anyone that I am worth something BECAUSE I already know that I am - FINALLY (dammit!). And it's not to say that I don't and won't have my bad days, but there is something in me that knows that when I go through those moods, it is only a slight detour off the road of where I'm really headed.
That's it.
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